Riding Tsunamis and Grappling with Tigers

For the last 6 months I’ve dreamt of being next to a body of water.

suddenly the shoreline begins to shallow out and the water recedes into itself. 

Its building the biggest wave I’ve ever seen. 

I’m afraid. 

surely this wave will kill me, and destroy everything i love and value. 

sometimes in my dream i ride the wave. Other times, if i don’t accept It, I’m fighting within the currents of its wrath, trying my hardest not to drown.

lastnight, i dreamt i rode It, as i was riding i was passing up some of my family and decided to get off and die with them. 

i managed to get everyone into a home and bunkered us in, the waves seemed to have subsided but now there was a storm & the Jungle that was once barricaded, was set free by the ocean.

someone was left outside, and that person was running from wild cats, Tigers, black panthers and one more i couldn’t quite discern.  

Letting that person in i knew i would have to fight off a wild cat, but would dare not leave him out to die for not trying. 

the Tiger got in, 

i was afraid.  

I grappled with tiger, It locked Its jaw on my arm, and with some unknown power i flung Him off of me like a dog. In anger he tried to devour everyone else in the home but i got him out just in time.

the tsunami in my dream feels like All of the opportunities that flood my grasp in the waking world. 

The wave is coming, and i can decide to ride It or suffer inside of It by not accepting It. 

the tiger in my dream is still a bit of a mystery. I remember him so clearly.

in the waking world the tiger is likely the fight. 

the idea of the fight is fatiguing.  

But the reality of It, isn’t as bad as we thought it’d be. 

and we are surprisingly grateful for the fight afterwards.  

Grateful for the fight every day with the Tiger. 

i don’t want to fight with him everyday but because i do, I’m stronger. I’ve built a muscle i didn’t even know i had.

i wouldn’t know the extent of my capacity if It wasn’t for my experience grappling with this Tiger.

afterwards, i know i can do anything. 

and that’s the gift. 

no one wants to wake up every day and fight a tiger. 

therefore no one will know the magnitude of their being, the possibilities,

they will always live in some box, cradled by their fears. 

although i did not consciously choose to fight this damn tiger every day. 

my soul knew what It needed to experience in this lifetime and i find myself in awe continually awakening to its calling. 

-with Love, a dreaming FEE$